


one

by chtkwn (mooshu)



Series: disorderly au [6]
Category: VIXX
Genre: Autism, M/M, Neurodiversity, autistic!leo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-14
Updated: 2016-02-14
Packaged: 2018-05-20 08:16:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5998459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mooshu/pseuds/chtkwn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Taekwoon just nods, his words are all gone now. He wishes he had more for this moment, but maybe that single one is enough. It means a lot more than anyone else would ever know.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	one

**Author's Note:**

> happy valentines day!! this is rushed im sry. may also be too cheesy,,,...

Like most holidays, Taekwoon doesn't understand Valentine's Day. People gives candy and chocolate and stuffed animals to their loved ones, but you can do that on any day. Why do they choose to do so on Valentine's Day? Why is it so special? He asked Hakyeon a long time ago but he didn't really have a good answer.

The library is decorated for the holiday. Pink, white, red streamers and paper hearts and a table full of romance novels and such and such. They have story time for children every evening and the theme for this week is Valentine's Day. ((They also serve free red fruit punch and heart shaped sugar cookies along with the story, and Taekwoon is always the first one there to get his share.))

One day as they're rearranging the Religion section, Taekwoon's coworker tells him he's planning on proposing to his girlfriend on Valentine's Day. Taekwoon doesn't understand why he's telling him this, usually he and the other few library employees avoid Taekwoon as much as they can. 

He doesn't know how to respond. "Okay," he says. "Congratulations."

The other shakes his head. "She hasn't said yes yet." Then he leaves Taekwoon alone in the pile of Religion books.

 

-

 

Eventhough Taekwoon doesn't understand Valentine's Day, Hakyeon still celebrates it the best he can. It's hard to give him gifts because he's picky. He's terrified of balloons, not a big fan of chocolate, and doesn't care about stuffed animals that much. He took Taekwoon out to a Valentine's buffet a few years ago, and now it's their tradition. That's his gift to Taekwoon every year.

Now Taekwoon is thinking about how he doesn't give Hakyeon anything in return on Valentine's Day. Maybe he should. Valentine's is the day of love apparentally, and Taekwoon loves Hakyeon. He thinks Hakyeon would like it if he showed it a little bit. He's never done romantic gestures or anything like that. He's never even said _I love you_ to Hakyeon out loud before. 

Taekwoon wonders why he's feeling these things now when Valentine's Day meant nothing to him in the past, though he thinks it has something to do with his coworker telling him about proposing to his girlfriend. That sounds nice. Maybe Taekwoon can propose to Hakyeon for Valentine's Day too, though there's no point. They already live together and sleep in the same bed. They're kinda already married.

 

-

 

The super market is a little crowded the day before Valentine's Day, but they need to shop because Hakyeon has been too busy this week to go until now. Taekwoon presses his hunting headphones from his birthday tight on his ears as they squeeze their way between a couple looking at giant versions of chocolate bars wrapped in pink and a few kids picking out Valentine cards for school.

"I remember those days," Hakyeon says. Taekwoon does too. It's not memories that he likes to think about though. Any memory involving school is a bad one.

Their shopping is successful, with only one minor incident - their usual brand of cooking oil they get is sold out and it throws Taekwoon off so badly he has to go to the restroom and breathe for a moment. It's pretty silly but that's just how he is. 

It makes him think about how lucky he is to have someone like Hakyeon, who doesn't mind being with someone that has to pause everything for a full ten minutes because cooking oil nearly sends them into meltdown. It makes Taekwoon feel sappy and gross, in the love kind of way. He thinks Valentine's Day is getting to him.

As they're making their way to the cash registers, Hakyeon stops, picking up a blue and pink stuffed owl with a heart on the center of its stomach. "This is adorable," he says. He playfully wiggles it towards Taekwoon's direction. "Taekwoonie, buy this for me?" 

Taekwoon is still thinking about the cooking oil, worrying about the new brand they got and if it's any good. He blinks at the owl and pushes it away. He's trying to do it as playfully as he can but maybe he fails because Hakyeon's smile falters for a moment. 

"It's okay, I'm just joking," he says, placing the owl back with the other ones on the shelf. 

 

-

 

Valentine's Day, the next day, is on a Saturday. Taekwoon wakes up bright and early while Hakyeon is still asleep - he usually sleeps in late on the weekend because work wears him down during the week. Usually Taekwoon gets bored of waiting on him to wake up but this morning it's perfect, because he's going to go back to the super market secretly.

After he got his mind off the cooking oil last night, Taekwoon started to think about the owl and Hakyeon and how sad he looked. He didn't mean to make him sad, and he wants to make up for it so he's going to go buy the owl.

It's a last minute Valentine's Day gift. Taekwoon should have gotten something earlier but he had trouble thinking of what to buy. He was so close to just giving up on it altogether and trying again next year. 

Taekwoon leaves a short note on the counter so Hakyeon won't worry just in case he wakes up before the other gets back. He rides the bus to the super market, in his usual spot three seats behind the bus driver, who calls him _buddy_ for some reason. An old woman drenched in strong citrus perfume sits next to him and Taekwoon thinks he's going to die before the bus can make it to the super market.

He doesn't though. He gets there and grabs the owl fast, he's lucky because there's only three left now. All the lines at the cash registers are long. He counts the people over and over until it's just him, then he's out. Another successful shopping trip he thinks.

 

-

 

Fortunately, Hakyeon is still sleeping when Taekwoon gets back home. He goes through their closet, which is so messy it's sad, and manages to find some old wrapping paper from Christmas. It has snowmen on it. Taekwoon had forgotten to get some Valentine's Day kind from the super market, but this'll do. Hakyeon won't mind. 

Taekwoon locks himself in the bedroom to wrap, so Hakyeon won't see it if he wakes up. He struggles with wrapping things because tape is hard to control for him, but he tries. He's just pressing down the very last piece of tape when there's a knock on the door.  

"Good morning," Hakyeon says. "It's Valentine's Day!"

Taekwoon nods before remembering that Hakyeon can't see it through the door. He's done wrapping anyway, so it's safe to come out now. He looks over it. It's messy and has too much tape and Taekwoon is just now realizing he should have put the owl in a box first, then wrap the box. But it's too late now. This'll have to do.

"What's that?" Hakyeon asks Taekwoon when he comes out. He's holding it behind his back, trying to be teasing. He's not so good at it he thinks. "Is that for me?" 

Taekwoon nods, and Hakyeon's smile widens. "Really? Can I open it now?"

Taekwoon wonders if he should let Hakyeon have it now or not. He had planned on giving it to him during their annual Valentine's buffet tonight, but now he thinks he can't wait that long. He's actually excited to give Hakyeon this gift. That's another new feeling.

He takes too long to answer, so Hakyeon speaks again. "Let's eat breakfast first?" he suggests, and Taekwoon agrees. 

 

-

 

Breakfast is eggs and toast. Taekwoon only nibbles a little bit because now he's kind of nervous instead of excited. He hopes the owl makes Hakyeon happy but what if it just reminds him of yesterday, when Taekwoon pushed it out his hands? Then he'll be sad again. Hopefully Taekwoon is just overthinking it, like he does with most things.

Hakyeon is talking about the buffet tonight, and how excited he is to open his gift and mentions that this is the first time Taekwoon's ever given him something on Valentine's Day. "What made you do this?" he asks, but Taekwoon doesn't really know how to answer so he just shrugs.

He thinks he's going to let Hakyeon open the present, because dinner is a long time away and he can't wait. He's pretty sure Hakyeon can't wait either, he seems very enthusiastic to get it. So as soon as they've finished breakfast, Taekwoon hands the owl over to Hakyeon, who claps.

"I'm excited!" he says for the hundredth time. He immediately starts to tear the wrapping paper, commenting on how cute the snowmen are. Bibi curiously sniffs at the paper that falls to the floor. 

Hakyeon looks surprised when he pulls the owl out of its wrapping paper cocoon. Surprised is a good reaction, Taekwoon thinks, but he's not sure. It's relieving when Hakyeon breaks into a smile, then moving from his spot on the couch to Taekwoon, who's in his recliner. It's only made for one person, so Hakyeon basically sits in his lap, wrapping his arms around the other's neck and giving him a kiss on the cheek. 

The kiss is wet so Taekwoon wipes it off. He covers his face with his hands - he can feel it turning red.

Hakyeon pokes at him. "Thank you so much, Taekwoon," he says. "I really love it - I really love _you_."

Taekwoon wants to return the words right back, but he can't. They're stuck in his throat and won't come out no matter how hard he tries. It's frustrating. Why can't he say it when he means it so much? He lets out a small whine.

Hakyeon laughs at him, getting up out of his lap. "Sorry. You're so cute when you're flustered."

The words are right there. "Me too."

"Hm?"

Taekwoon shakes his head, uncovering his face. Hakyeon's sitting up his owl on top of the corner shelf. It looks out of place, a stuffed animal in a living room, but Hakyeon says something about wanting everyone to see it. Taekwoon doesn't know who _everyone_ is, no one ever comes to their house. He opens his mouth again, trying to speak, but nothing is happening. 

Hakyeon notices. "Just take your time," he says, but Taekwoon is tired of taking his time. 

 

-

 

Taekwoon doesn't say it then. He doesn't say it until later on that night, after their annual Valentine's buffet, whie they're in bed. Hakyeon's kissing him, little ones on his face, neck, ears. They tickle a lot and feel so nice and Taekwoon can't help but giggle - he _never_ giggles.

Hakyeon instructs him to do same, give him a kiss here and there and Taekwoon does. One on his eyelid, on the tip of his nose, on his jaw. He leans in like he's going to kiss Hakyeon on his forehead, but instead he licks it.

"Taekwoon!" Hakyeon wipes at the wetness but he's laughing so Taekwoon knows he's not really angry. He still gives him another real kiss on the same spot to make up for it though.

"Hakyeon," he says, just because.

They settle down after that, laying still and quiet in each other's arms. There's only their breathing, and the jingling sound of Bibi playing with his toy bell in the kitchen. It also dark, the only light is coming from the small night light that's plugged in the corner of the room.

Hakyeon yawns. "I had a nice Valentine's Day," he says. "Did you?" 

Taekwoon nods. He can feel sleep creeping up on him. He's ready for it.

"Good... I love you."

"Love," Taekwoon echoes, surprising himself. 

He thinks he surprises Hakyeon as well, because he's very awake now. "Love?"

Taekwoon nods yet again. He's so close and Hakyeon is looking at him expectantly, silently coaching him to say to rest. Taekwoon can't, it's too hard, so he just pokes Hakyeon in the cheek. "Love," he repeats, then pokes. 

It's enough, he thinks, because Hakyeon freezes for a moment before pulling Taekwoon even closer, squeezing him tightly. His fingers brush through Taekwoon's hair. "Thanks," he says after a long while, "for loving me. I'm very glad you do."

Taekwoon just nods, his words are all gone now. He wishes he had more for this moment, but maybe that single one is enough. It means a lot more than anyone else would ever know.

**Author's Note:**

> thx friends for reading :^)


End file.
